'lies'.

do you think there's a way of twisting our thinking, doing someting that will warp our thoughts and make us believe what our hearts truly don't? do you think that if we, maybe, recited a wishful belief in our heads over and over again, we'd actually genuinly believe it eventually? is that how successful lying comes about? is it possible to truly believe in what we never felt we could? convince our hearts to feel otherwise about everything that went against our self-morals?

if it were possible, decisions would be easier to make. if things were so simple, minds could be changed within seconds. no, simply, minds could be changed. but of course, things don't work that way, no matter how much we really do want them to, do they? we can try our hardest to convince ourselves into feeling and believing in something, but in the end, even though we might think we have succeeded, would we have, really? deep down in us, would we have been convinced so?

god, if only things were so easy to change. if only things worked perfect. if only things worked that way. a thousand 'if only's.

if i could escape.


thank god huh. for what?