Thursday, May 03, 2007

'minjun? minjun?'.

i never liked running with the aim of reaching out for something. i never liked sweating in the aim of running after something. i never liked the game of tag or catching. and, simply, i still don't. so why won't you guys stop messing me up and leave me alone. i do not like catching. and i simply do not like the games you 'll are trying to play with me. you heard me: i don't want to play tag anymore. i'm sick of being it. why don't you guys start chasing in vain for a start? you guys can tell me how you like it after that...


she's been acting so strange recently. am i doing too much for her? am i turning her heart to stone? she seems barely able to feel for anyone or anything anymore. where is she? maybe i'm taking over too much. on the other hand, it is something good. she is rather too weak, at times, for her own good. at times. but now, despite myself, i'm afraid that she's turned into a whole other person. she isn't the girl i knew... she isn't the girl who needs my help anymore. i've lost her, she's gone, she has disappeared.

once, her weakness was unbearable just to watch. i'd stand and watch her, laughing myself to sleep. a sleep of boredom... now, watching her scares me. she's insensitive. her emotions have disappeared. she watches others fall and she laughs, even those she used to love, those who meant the world to her. when she starts showing a little gratitude, a little sensitivity, i can't help but to breathe a sigh of relief: there's my girl. perhaps i taught her a little too much, held her hand a little while too long, too far. really, who is she now? i don't know her that well anymore...

maybe, just maybe, she has become me.

what have i done?

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